Hopeless

Hopeless (Hopeless, #1)

Rating: 2 Stars

Synopsis via Goodreads:

Sometimes discovering the truth can leave you more hopeless than believing the lies…

That’s what seventeen-year-old Sky realizes after she meets Dean Holder. A guy with a reputation that rivals her own and an uncanny ability to invoke feelings in her she’s never had before. He terrifies her and captivates her all in the span of just one encounter, and something about the way he makes her feel sparks buried memories from a past that she wishes could just stay buried.

Sky struggles to keep him at a distance knowing he’s nothing but trouble, but Holder insists on learning everything about her. After finally caving to his unwavering pursuit, Sky soon finds that Holder isn’t at all who he’s been claiming to be. When the secrets he’s been keeping are finally revealed, every single facet of Sky’s life will change forever.

I had some seriously high expectations for this novel. I’ve been meaning to get my hands on it for about a year now, and I was so excited when I finally did. But – lo and behold – I quickly come to find out that this is NOT a heartbreaking story of two mature teenagers who have their own painful secrets and mysteries, but, instead, this is a story about a stalker and stalkee, and how this situation is somehow shown in a positive light.

I’m not talking the normal kind of “stalking” that everyone does. Yes, everyone. There’s no denying that we all stalk people on Facebook and Twitter.

But that’s not what Holder does.

He takes it to a whole new level. A disgusting one.

You see someone in a store. They’re kind of hot. This has all happened to us. You might stare a little too long, there might even be that embarrassing little dribble of drool running down your chin.

And then they see you looking. Usually, you’ll turn your head and (try and fail) to pretend that no, no, no, you weren’t staring lustfully at them. Not you, not them, no no no. That’s not drool on your chin, it’s, uh, it’s water. Yeah! Water. Just water that is left over from lunch, thanks. No, no I don’t need a napkin.

This is where the event of lustfully staring usually stops. You go on your way, they go their way. No one the wiser and possibly a funny story to recount to your friends later, about that hot-mother-effer you lusted after.

This is not where it ended for Holder and Sky. No. He follows her to her car, only to demand her name. She’s scared and annoyed, tells him to go away, and gets in her car. But wait, his hand stops your door. You can’t get away. But it’s the middle of the day and you don’t even know the guy, so he wouldn’t actually do anything, would he?

You tell him your name. He doesn’t believe you, so – apparently what every sane human being would do – you show him your drivers license and he looks at it for no more than five seconds. He apologizes and tells you he thought you were someone else. Time to go now. Drive away quickly.

Same day. You go for a run. Guess who just happens to be around? That’s right, the creeper!!

You then realize he knows where you live, what your full name is, what your organ donor status is, and what your birthday is. He even goes so far as to recite it all back to you like it’s the information for the big exam tomorrow.

At this point, it’s time to hightail it out of there. Possibly call the cops.

But guess what?

Sky thinks it’s cute.

CUTE.

Now, there are some warning bells going off for her, but not nearly enough. All of the bells are smothered by how hot Holder is. Who cares if he’s a complete freak and possibly an ax murderer as long as he’s hot, right?

“And I’m not apologizing to you, because I don’t want you to forget what happened and you should never forgive me for it. Ever. Never make excuses for me, Sky.”

Neon flashing signs should be flashing behind your eyes right now, folks. Not to mention it sounds like an abusive situation to be in.

“He doesn’t react the way he does because there are five different sides to his personality. He reacts the way he does because there’s only one side to Dean Holder.

Passionate.”

You say passionate, I say crazy. Crazy like Charles Manson. Crazy like Ted Bundy. Crazy with pretty words or pretty looks and covering it up with a good story.

Crazy where the guy has five different personalities.

But, hey, he’s hot. Remember that. At least as he changes personalities he keeps the same face.

And then Holder starts showing up to run with Sky in the morning, already outside her door.

Uh. Yeah, no.

If Holder was a golden retriever, this would be perfectly fine, but he’s a guy you do not really know, but seems to know far too much out you, soooo . . .

But he’s a hot stalker.

“The door closes behind him and he leaves me with even more questions. But what’s new?”

Such a smart thing to date the guy who man-handles you, who you don’t know anything about, and has been in multiple fights. Good for you . . .

NOT.

Why would you even deal with that kind of crap? Like, really? Sky even admits to herself that their relationship seems to be wholly based off of their lust for each other. This book is drowning in lust, I’ll tell you.

And, oh, the effing kissing/not-quite-kissing scenes.

DIE A PAINFUL DEATH KISSING SCENES.

For one thing, there are way, way too many of them. And not only are there endless amounts of kissing/not-quite-kissing scenes, but all of them are detailing EVERY FREAKIN’ THING. Everything.

I like kissing scenes. I do. But this was just ridiculous.

“It’s appreciative and gentle and he keeps one hand on the back of my head and on my hip as he slowly tastes and teases every part of my mouth. This kiss is just like he is – studied and never in a hurry.”

Never in a hurry? Studied?

You’re telling me that the boy who freaked out over your bracelet in the cafeteria, the boy who made you wait without an apology as to why he’s acting like a total douchebag and who is ignoring you for no apparent reason is studied and never in a hurry . . . I do so hope you mean Holder is never in a hurry to tell you ANYTHING and that he’s studied in the ways of never actually talking to you and sidestepping all your questions. If not . . . well, I’d hate to see what you classify as stupid and fast then, Sky.

And when Holder drops a freakin’ bomb on Sky’s life, she clearly tells him to leave her alone for the night so she can think, and so what does the boy do?

Sneaks in through her window in the middle of the night, causing poor Sky to have a heart attack when she wakes up to realize there’s someone else in her bed.

“I couldn’t leave you. I just needed to make sure you were okay.” He puts his hand on my neck, right below my ear, and brushes along my jaw with his thumb. “Your heart,” he says, feeling my pulse beating against his fingertips. “You’re scared.”

You bet she’s scared! You snuck into her bed and the second she wakes up, screams, you feel for her pulse to – I don’t even know – make sure she’s still breathing???

Uh. No. You creep.

But, guess what? This is the moment she falls even more in love with him. I kid you not. Sure, he scared the utter crap out of her, but she just had a bad dream and needs the arm of her man.

WHAT.

He treats her so poorly too. I didn’t even notice it at first because of all the stalking the boy does, but he slaps Sky on her ass many times, will talk or not talk to her when it fits him, and teases her relentlessly about her lust for him. It’s ridiculous and completely unappealing.

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